Thursday, October 8, 2009

Hormones and Duct Tape


Several years ago the American Medical Association drew the conclusion from a giant study that hormone replacement therapy was a bad thing and millions of women all over American abandoned their estrogen and progesterone.

The result was an increase in crime throughout the United States and an unprecedented rise in gun sales. Since some of those members of the AMA were married to women who were now packing, it seemed a new conclusion should be drawn. Now the verdict is “not so much”.

Other than the gunmakers, everyone else gave a sigh of relief, especially the drug companies. And to make women feel safer, the drug manufacturers decided that a patch would be a better idea than a pill. So now you could get estrogen from a little stick on thingie.

The first patch was big and looked like an off-pink bull’s eye stuck on the belly. Some women objected to the esthetics of that and one was developed that looked like a piece of clear tape.

Unfortunately, the technology that went into the delivery of the hormones through the skin far outreached the technology that went into the sticky stuff that made the patch stay on. Since you can only change the patch weekly or bi-weekly, it has to remain in place through all sorts of activities, including showering and sweating.

And in the case of the little patch, that doesn’t appear to be doable. Take one shower and the patch begins to peel back. Two showers or some sweating and it’s hanging by one little spot. Now since this is a prescription you can’t just replace them willy nilly or you’ll run out. The only solution is duct tape.

So the esthetics of the little clear patch are completely cancelled out by having a square of silver duct tape stuck to your person. My suggestion is that the two companies merge and put the hormones on a roll like regular tape. Roll off what you need and apply. If you’ve had a really bad hormonal day, just roll off a yard or so and wrap it around your body. End of hormone issues.

No comments:

Post a Comment